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Humor by Yuckitup! Click Here for more jokes, and funny stuff Giraffe JokesIn the summer of 1993, Rob and Jason, worked in a Tarzan show at Silver Springs (an attraction in Florida). The show was near a "petting zoo" area which house goats, deer, and giraffes. The giraffes aways leaning over the fence to eat goodies that the tourists held-up for the giraffes to get. One day, Rob and Jason heard this screaming noise over in the petting area. Apparently, a man was walking away from the giraffes and he dropped something. When he bent over to retrieve it two things happened: 1) he exposed a portion of his backside (commonly called "plumber's butt") and 2) one of the giraffes decided this was some sort of food offering and bent down to lick it up. When the man felt the giraffe's long wet tongue sliding down his crack, he stood up and started screaming. This caused his cheeks to pinch the giraffe's tongue. This caused the giraffe to panic and it started screaming (sort of) also. Rob and Jason heard the noise and looked over to see the man standing with the giraffe's tongue coming out of the back of his pants. Several people rushed over and eventually freed both man and giraffe. A man walked into a bar with his giraffe, and asked the barman for a pint for himself & one for the giraffe. They drank up, and then a few more followed, and before long, the giraffe (who was a very inexperienced drinker) was flat on the floor. The man, naturally, couldn't carry such a large animal home, so he left it in the bar, and, as he was leaving, the barman yelled: "Hey, you can't leave that lyin' there!" The man turned around and said, "It's OK, it's not a lion, it's a giraffe!" There was this giraffe right, and it was quite a good skillser, so one day the giraffe was just walking around displaying its good skills and long neck, when all of a sudden, it walked into the bar, and said could I have a pint of beer, and........a packet of fine leaves please? and the barman goes why the big pause? And the giraffe says I'm not a bear, I'm a giraffe! Right then, There was this girarf right, and the girarf often went to play badskillston (or badminton as you might play it) anyway, the girarf walked into the bar and the barman says are you going to badminton? And the girarf says not now (cos it was wednesday evening at 10-30 pm) but I might be going tomorrow. Reader's voice - Hold on, that's not very amusing No, but here's the dead funny punchline: Rob the physicist walked up to the giraffe and said Good badminton timescale observation skills, girarf. Arf. How much does it cost to buy a drink for a Giraffe? > Ans. Not very much as it doesn't drink beer!!!!! Q: What do you call a Spanish giraffe with two tails ? A: Kenneth !! Q: How many giraffe does it take to change a light bulb ? A: Five, or seven at weekends !!!!!! Q: What do you call a giraffe with a bad sense of humour? A: Barney.
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