Casey Stengel Quotes
Being with a woman never hurt no professional baseball player. It’s staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.If you hit a home run, you can take your time running the bases.The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided.
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Short Jokes via Twitter
- *Spelling Bee* Moderator: your word is inward Contestant: N-I-G-G Moderator: Oh, no... Stop... Stop 05:52:54 AM November 03, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- If auto piloted cars work as well as auto corrected texting we are so ducked! 10:19:20 PM July 18, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- When I grow up, I want to be a unicorn, so I can stab people with my head. #oneliner 04:13:59 PM May 29, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Stop struggling! They play this music in the elevator because we're supposed to slow dance, lady. 05:44:21 PM April 29, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- You wouldn't like me when I'm angry... Because, I always back up my rage with facts and documented sources. —Credible Hulk 09:52:46 PM April 26, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Apparently if you call it street credibility you do not have it 09:48:42 PM April 26, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Autocorrect: Did you mean - Me: almost certainly not, but go on 09:32:01 PM April 26, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- I was telling my wife I was worried the NSA was listening into our conversations, she laughed, I laughed, the Amazon Echo laughed. 09:23:24 PM April 26, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Many people are shocked... ...when they find out I'm a really bad electrician. 08:30:44 PM March 30, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Maybe the Pentagon should change the nuclear codes to more than 140 characters, so they can't be tweeted. 09:35:00 AM January 14, 2017 ReplyRetweetFavorite
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